


And I Oop-

by polkadotPotter



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Almost all of the Avengers are LGBTQ+, Buzzfeed Unsolved References, Civil War did not happen, Crack, F/F, F/M, Flash not believing that Peter Parker has a Stark Internship, Gay Pride, Infinity War and Endgame also Did Not happen, Infinity War?? literally who is she, M/M, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Not Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Sass, Social Media, They talked out their feelings like actual people, Trolls get destroyed, Twitter, lots of sass, meme references
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-19
Updated: 2019-06-19
Packaged: 2020-05-14 13:13:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19274038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/polkadotPotter/pseuds/polkadotPotter
Summary: Twitter just got a lot more heroic, what with the Avengers being regular users and all.





	1. Chapter 1

Peter Parker @beterbarker

wow i can't believe betty just single-handedly ended racism

Don't Call Me MJ @mostpowerfulgirl

@beterbarker i feel like i'm going to regret asking but what did she do

Peter Parker @beterbarker

@mostpowerfulgirl some middle aged white mom was being rude to flash and betty threw her cream cheese at this woman and just completely deadpan goes 'oops'

Nedward @guyinthechair

@beterbarker @mostpowerfulgirl a legend

Nedward @guyinthechair

also @beterbarker why are you with flash

Betty Bryant @bettyboop

@beterbarker @mostpowerfulgirl @guyinthechair at me next time cowards

Betty Bryant @bettyboop

@mostpowerfulgirl also I'm giving both of them rides home today because may is at work and flash's dad took away his car lmao

Nedward @guyinthechair

@bettyboop can i get an f

Betty Bryant @bettyboop

@guyinthechair no you can not

Peter Parker @beterbarker

@guyinthechair @bettyboop f

 

Gabi @gabienriqz

not to sound dumb but who the fuck is @beterbarker and why are like,, a l l of the avengers following him i-

sister stop @kvlton

@gabienriqz and i oop

Sarah @ihatebronies

@gabienriqz he goes to my school! his name's peter and he supposedly has an internship with stark industries

Fastest Man @flashthompson

@gabienriqz @ihatebronies lmao he's lying about that

Gabi @gabienriqz

@flashthompson oh my bad ig the avengers are following him for some other reason that makes even less sense

@beterbarker has started following @gabienriqz!

It's fucking @hammertime

@gabienriqz secret avenger love child

Katie @katiekatie

@hammertime @gabienriqz like?? which avengers?? or do you mean like,, all of them at once

It's fucking @hammertime

@katiekatie @gabienriqz who knows

Katie @katiekatie

@hammertime @gabienriqz ominous i love it

 

Peter Parker @beterbarker

why am i getting so many followers all of a sudden im scared

Don't Call Me MJ @mostpowerfulgirl

@beterbarker you should be

Peter Parker @beterbarker

@mostpowerfulgirl aw shit dog

 

Spidey @spiderman

just your daily reminder that i literally have no clue what in the hell i am doing

Abe @babeyabey

@spiderman i feel so safe knowing this man is protecting my city

Spidey @spiderman

@babeyabe ur welcome 

Abe @babeyabey

@spiderman oh shit he fuckin responded

 

Spidey @spiderman

let's do a Q&A!! #askspidey

dead inside @ihavenosoul

what's the weirdest thing you've ever seen as spiderman #askspidey

Spidey @spiderman

@ihavenosoul i wasn't spidey when this happened but my friend sent me a spidey porn rp once and that was kind of horrifying

Hannah @spideyownsme

who is your favorite avenger #askspidey

Spidey @spiderman

@spideyownsme well if we're talking as superheroes then probably @thorofasgard, but as people it's @tonystark hands down

THOR @thorofasgard

@spiderman THANK YOU YOUNG SPIDER!! I APPRECIATE YOU AS WELL!

Spidey @spiderman

holyshitthorrespondedtomytweetheknowswhoiam

I Am Iron Man @tonystark

@spiderman you're my favorite too kid

Spidey @spiderman

@tonystark thanks mr stark!! 

I Am Iron Man @tonystark

@spiderman you can drop the 'mr' and call me tony anytime, you know

Spidey @spiderman

@tonystark i know >;)

Harry @harrisonw

what is the most rewarding part of being spidey #askspidey

Spidey @spiderman

@harrisonw honestly just knowing that i helped someone or made someones life better makes me smile and its the best part cuz its just so simple

jakey d @bmcstan

does spider-man is gay #askspidey

Spidey @spiderman

@bmcstan spiderman does not gay. spider-man does bisexual though

jakey d @bmcstan

@spiderman holy shit an icon

 

PinkNews @PinkNews

NYC’s favorite web-slinger opens up on Twitter about being bisexual during a Q&A with fans! What does this mean for the future of queer representation and superheroes? www.pinknews.com/spiderman-bisexual-twitter

 

Washington Post @WashingtonPost

Spider-Man comes out as bisexual during a Twitter Q&A. What other superheroes are a part of the LGBT community? www.washingtonpost.com/queer-superheroes-spider-man

 

Buzzfeed @Buzzfeed

Spider-Man really does swing both ways! How Spidey came out on Twitter and more! www.buzzfeed.com/swings-both-ways-bisexual

 

I Am Iron Man @tonystark

@spiderman jeez kid i can hear the PR department screaming in agony from my floor

Pepper Potts @mostpowerfulwoman

@spiderman @tonystark I’m so proud that you felt you were ready to share this with the world, Spider-Man. But please warn me next time if you plan to make such a reveal. 

Spidey @spiderman

@mostpowerfulwoman sorry ms potts!! ily

 

Gabi @gabienriqz

omg spider man is bi im shaking the gays are w i n n i n g

Maddie @picknsaveme

@spiderman I LOVE AND SUPPORT YOU YOURE DOING GREAT SWEETIE

 

The Avengers @AvengersOfficial

The Avengers are proud to support @spiderman in the month of June and every month after! Happy Pride Spider-Man, and everyone else who celebrates.

charlie @gunsarerights

@AvengersOfficial spiderman just lost my support what the fuck how could you let someone like that be a hero

Fastest Man @flashthompson

@gunsarerights remind me how many lives you’ve saved again?? 

charlie @gunsarerights

@flashthompson that’s irrelevant

Fastest Man @flashthompson

@gunsarerights i thought so :)

@spiderman has started following @flashthompson!

Fastest Man @flashthompson

HOLY SHITSBWOWPWJ

 

Spidey @spiderman

thanks to everyone for your support! it means a lot to me :) even if you don’t agree with me being who i am, don’t worry, i’ll still save you if you need it

Ally @dcismylife

@spiderman no offence but i dont want to get saved by a fag

Spidey @spiderman

@dcismylife lmao yikes ig


	2. Chapter 2

**Peter Quill @starlord**

im so glad i came back to earth because 90s music is a fucking goldmine i cant believe i’ve been listening to 80s stuff all these years

 

**Peter Quill @starlord**

EARLY 2000s MUSIC IS EVEN BETTER!!!! OH MY GOD

 

**Peter Quill @starlord**

I CAN’T BELIEVE I WAS TOLD THAT ZUNES WERE THE LATEST TECHNOLOGY ON EARTH @tonystark GAVE ME THE LATEST STARK-PHONE AND NOT TO BE DRAMATIC BUT I WANT TO MARRY WHOEVER CAME UP WITH SPOTIFY

**I Am Iron Man @tonystark**

**@starlord** quill, i gave you your phone and i can take it back. chill

**Peter Quill @starlord**

**@tonystark** my girlfriend is a space assassin, i’d like to see you try

 

**Peter Quill @starlord**

**@beterbarker** was watching a buzzfeed unsolved video??? about me?????? what is this fuckery

**Peter Parker @beterbarker**

**@starlord** when you disappeared your case was unsolved because nobody could figure out where you went... so they made an unsolved video about you!

**Peter Parker @beterbarker**

**@starlord** now that i think about it what does this mean,, like we actually know where you went now?? do we tell them we solved their case or 

********

********

**Peter Quill @starlord**

**@beterbarker** why are you asking me i’ve been in space for the past 20 years 

 

**Peter Quill @starlord**

hey **@buzzfeedunsolved** i’m peter quill

**Buzzfeed Unsolved @BuzzfeedUnsolved**

**@starlord** what the fuck

 

**Shane Mandej @shalexandej**

**@ryansbergara** what do we do??? like uhhh fix it video??

**Ryan Bergara @ryansbergara**

**@shalexandej** yeah just oh hey guys turns out peter quill was actually abducted by aliens and was off saving the universe this whole time and ryan was RIGHT

**Shane Mandej @shalexandej**

**@ryansbergara** i hate you

**Ryan Bergara @ryansbergara**

**@shalexandej** i hope you know that you can never get away with dismissing my aliens theory ever again 

 

**Shane Mandej @shalexandej**

this is the worst day of my LIFE

 

**Peter Quill @starlord**

im starring in the new episode of buzzfeed unsolved ya’ll should go watch!! _www.youtube.com/buzzfeed-unsolved-peter-quill-resolved/720016118_

 

**Ryan Bergara @ryansbergara**

watch the new special episode of unsolved where i get bragging rights for being right about the circumstances of peter quill’s disappearance _www.youtube.com/buzzfeed-unsolved-peter-quill-resolved/720016118_

 

**Shane Mandej @shalexandej**

i hate everything _www.youtube.com/buzzfeed-unsolved-peter-quill-resolved/720016118_

 

**Peter Parker @beterbarker**

this is wild

**Fastest Man @flashthompson**

hang on how the hell does penis parker know STARLORD

**Peter Parker @beterbarker**

**@flashthompson** its because of my internship dude

**Fastest Man @flashthompson**

**@beterbarker** no way is that real parker. and if that is true WHICH IM NOT SAYING IT IS, you expect me to believe you just randomly meet avengers at your internship?? who else do you know?? black widow? thor? the hulk??

**Peter Parker @beterbarker**

**@flashthompson** well

**I Am Iron Man @tonystark**

**@flashthompson @beterbarker** yes, actually, he does. in fact, peter know most of the avengers. not because of his internship, which IS real by the way. it’s because he’s a great kid and i thought he deserved to be introduced to his heroes.

**Peter Parker @beterbarker**

**@tonystark @flashthompson** omg thank you mr stark thats really nice of you

 

**Fastest Man @flashthompson**

wow i cant believe tony starks twitter got hacked

**Peter Parker @beterbarker**

**@flashthompson** it literally didn’t but go off i guess

 

**Harley @potatokeener**

**@tonystark** did you fucking replace me with another genius prodigy or do my eyes deceive me

**I Am Iron Man @tonystark**

**@potatokeener** i did not but as the kids say these days, “go off i guess”

 

**Harley @potatokeener**

**@beterbarker** who the fuck are you

**Peter Parker @beterbarker**

**@potatokeener** who the fuck are you

**Harley @potatokeener**

**@beterbarker** i asked you first

**Peter Parker @beterbarker**

**@potatokeener** i asked you second

**Harley @potatokeener**

**@beterbarker @tonystark** tony i like this one

**Peter Parker @beterbarker**

**@potatokeener @tonystark** mr stark why didnt you tell me about this guy 

**I Am Iron Man @tonystark1**

**@potatokeener @beterbarker** i was afraid

 

**Direct Messages**

**potatokeener:** no really who are you

 **beterbarker:** im an intern for mr stark but we have a really good relationship so sometimes i hang out when im not doing work stuff

 **beterbarker:** who are you??

 **potatokeener:** when i was like 10 he broke into my garage and i helped him fix his suit and i’ve been his long distance child ever since

****

**beterbarker:** hm

 **beterbarker** : inch resting

-

**katherine p @watchwhathappens**

wait so are we just gonna ignore tony stark knowing not only one but TWO random teenagers?

**jack @santafe**

 **@watchwhathappens** yes that is exactly what we are gonna do


End file.
